An excerpt from a blog post by Anne Bogart ( January 2011 Blog Entry- http://siti.groupsite.com/post/january-2011-change-your-mind)
“Another completely different brain function, and one that probably feels the most familiar to those of us brought up in secular consumerist cultures, is the brain function of the “little me.” We all have hopes and we have anxieties and this preoccupation with self precipitates the “little me” brain-set, the cognitive process in which obsession with personal triumphs, anguish, dissatisfaction and irritation reigns. And yet this is also a very useful brain function in the journey towards artistic expression or innovation of any kind. Most people, myself included, suspect that there is a relation between mood and creativity. I am skeptical about the overmedication and anesthetization of natural mood swings because I know from personal experience that dissatisfaction is an important ingredient in the recipe of the creative act. The brain is miraculously able to transform personal anguish, worry, anxiety and irritation into useful expression. The dissatisfactions of living, the self-consciousness, the ego and the ego’s vulnerabilities offer motivation to communicate, to formulate work. Our own little pains and triumphs can become fuel for will and perseverance.”
Her post as a whole discusses the creative process and how thinking, or more accurately, thinking differently, is essential to that process. It is a very interesting post and well worth reading. But for this blog post, I will focus on the above paragraph as that is what resonated most with me most as I grapple with the fear and anxiety with which I am starting 2011 and how that is fueling me to ‘communicate, to formulate’ work.
It is a new year and my “obsession with personal triumphs, anguish, dissatisfaction and irritation” is indeed reigning. After an incredibly successful 2010 I find myself beginning 2011 with fear about being able to grow successfully upon the success of 2010 and anxiety about how it to do it. Last year at this time I was full of adrenaline and excitement about launching WAM Theatre and sharing our double philanthropic model with the world. Everything seemed possible, but I had no idea how it would happen. This year I have some idea of how things happen and have no idea if it will be possible. While I am petrified, I happily find this very motivating. Last year, I was jumping in blindly. This year, I am dipping my toe in with more knowledge. I am considering ideas and creative collaborations carefully, am formulating development and marketing campaigns with a clear eye towards the future. I am reframing how I think of the fear, not as a barrier, but as a motivator.
Anne’s blog post came at exactly the right time. Through all the current fear and anxiety, WAM Theatre’s success in 2010 shines bright and is a clear beacon towards the future. Onwards and upwards.
Written by Kristen van Ginhoven, co-Artistic Director of WAM Theatre, www.kristenvanginhoven.com