This week, the news broke that Jenny Gersten was named Artistic Director of Williamstown Theatre Festival. Since then, I have not only been thinking about how amazing it is to that a woman was chosen for this prominent position, I have also been thinking about the fact that she is 41. Wow. An Artistic Director and a Working Mom. and 41. Did I mention she’s 41. A helluva accomplishment.

I’m going to be 38 in two weeks and I spend a lot of time wondering if I’ve ‘accomplished enough’, personally and professionally. I wonder if Ms. Gersten ever wonders that? I imagine she probably does. Many people I know do. Perhaps at whatever level you are at in this world, just ‘starting out’ or having already achieved ‘success’, one likely always wonders if there is more they can accomplish. Or do they?

Is it women who often wonder what more they can do to achieve their potential? Is it artists? Is it people who are ‘conscious’, passionate, ambitious? Is it just me? I certainly know it isn’t just me or just women, as I have many, many friends of both genders who lament about what more they can do to achieve their potential in their lifetime. I have many artist friends who suffer deep mental distress at how hard they work, and how lucky they have to be, in order to have some chance to do what they love and have some sort of standard of living. The artist path is certainly not an easy path for any person to choose. Yet, so many of us keep doing it. So many of us continue to struggle with all the consequences that come with the artist life because we know the deep joy that counters the distress when we do get the chance to work and live well, when we do manage to achieve that precious balance. Regardless of the level of achievement, be it Williamstown or WAM, it feels good. Doesn’t it?

Which makes me wonder why I’ve spent the last two days feeling slightly down about my ‘lack’ of ‘success’ as a near 38 year old as compared to Ms. Gersten’s apparent ‘abundance’ of ‘success’ as a 41 year old. I know that it simply has to do with the ‘level’ of her success and I recognize it’s all (mostly) in my head. Because, in the grand scheme of things, her success is no different than mine just because she is now AD of a theatre with a large budget and profile and I have recently co-founded a theatre company with a (very, very) small budget and a (so far) small profile. An accomplishment is an accomplishment.

I would love to sit down for tea with her someday in a lovely café somewhere in the beautiful Berkshires and see where she stands on it all. In the meantime, I’m over the moon that I have someone like her to look up to and be inspired by and I can’t wait to follow her and a new chapter at Williamstown.

Watch out world, I have three years and two weeks to go until I’m 41 so watch me go! WAM WAM WAM!

Written by Kristen van Ginhoven, co-Artistic Director of WAM Theatre. www.kristenvanginhoven.com